Great Expectations-guest post by Terry Drew Karanen

Have you ever suffered disappointment at some time in your life?

I suppose that's a rhetorical question since the answer is, "Well, duh!" We all experience disappointments. Most of my disillusionments have come from when I fall short of reaching my own goals or expectations for myself, not when others fail to live up to my desires. If you, like me, have been given the title of perfectionist (as if that was a badge of shame!), you are well aware that someone who is always striving for perfection is usually harder on him/herself than other people. We SO want to do it "right," whatever "right" is for us, for others or society. It begs the question, Is perfection is really possible? Are we running on a treadmill of frustration by trying so hard? In fact, why have expectations, great of otherwise, at all?

It's never perfect and it's always perfect.

Let me explain what I mean by that. I've been privileged to officiant for at least a hundred weddings, holy unions, commitment ceremonies, baptisms, christenings, funerals and memorials over my twenty years in ministry, as well as house blessings, pet blessings and a few exorcisms (more about that another time...). What I can report to you is that when planning the event the people involved want it to be "perfect" - this is particularly true for weddings. The belief is that we have "one shot" to get this right. No retakes. No revisions. One shot. Period.

One of the places I perform weddings in our area has a beautiful, expansive Italian garden. Most brides select a processional that goes from the very top of the gardens to a pavilion at the bottom. With a large wedding party it can take up to seven or eight minutes, but choreographed correctly by "moi" it's a beautiful and memorable event - unless it rains, as it often can in the summer here in south central Pennsylvania. We had an absolute downpour one day, but the bride was adamant about the processional. So it took place, in the downpour, with huge golf umbrellas provided by the resort for some protection. And ... it was perfect.

HOW could it have been?!? The couple had great expectations of their special day and a near monsoon was not part of the plan. I've heard there's an Italian tradition that says when it rains on your wedding it means God is showering you with blessings. If that's the case this couple was blessed beyond all expectation! The bride got exactly what she wanted - a beautiful processional - even if the gown and bridesmaids dresses were a little worse for the wear upon arrival at the lower pavilion. You might think I was dealing with a bridezilla who, come hell or (in this case) high water, was going to have it her way or the highway. Not at all.

I don't see it that way. If anything, I believe it showed a willingness, tenacity, dedication and determination to fulfill the desire of her fiancé and her. Have you had your plans go array to this extent, or even more severe? Did you think it was a failure and did you suffer the event? It's never perfect and it's always perfect. What that means to me is that it, whatever "it" is, is going to be exactly what it's going to be. We can plan or outline every single detail and be disappointed if things don't go according to plan, or we can go with the flow and enjoy the moment for what it is. Scripture says, "Time and unforeseen circumstances befall us all." What does that mean? It means life happens. "Shift" happens.

How we deal with the changes and shifts in life about which we seem to have no control will determine our moods, our attitudes about life, how much people want to be around us, and our future. Without "great expectations" of our future we will most likely end up with a less than a stellar or satisfying life. What do you "expect?" When Emma Curtis Hopkins, New Thought teacher and mental healing expert, was asked by Raymond Charles Barker why she thought a particular case for which she was present seem to have a healing that occurred so quickly and easily. Her answer? "It was what I expected." Can't you just imagine in the story of the resurrection of Lazarus when the great teacher Jesus proclaimed, "Lazarus, come out!" but nothing happening? Excuse me? The healing was, again, what he expected.

What do you expect from life, from your future? I invite you this week to think bigger than ever about what you want your life to look like. Would you be willing to do that? You could sit quietly, calm your senses and uncover the joys you desire, the peace you seek and the healings you require. Write those down, without regard to how many come up, and then pick just three. I'm not talking about a new car or a new job. I'm talking about how you envision a peace, a more harmonious life. Then give it to Spirit and expect great things! Let me know how that works out for you!

Special thanks to: Terry Drew Karanen
                             author, life coach, blogger, speaker
                             email: terry@terrydrewkaranen.com

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Love, Healing and Finding Your Own Wholeness

I believe that loving ourselves is the first step to healing and achieving wholeness. Yet sometimes the burdens from an illness can send us into a downward spiral . If we can find a place within ourselves that we can love-no matter what the challenges of the illness-healing and recognizing Wholeness can begin to blossom within us.

The end was the beginning:

Once a successful nurse and health administrator  had 3 major challenges happen all at the same time:

*She got the diagnosis of Amylateral Sclerosis(ALS) or Lou Gehrig’s disease which is a severe and chronic illness.
*Her home  was burglarized.
*She lost her job.

Her doctors told her she less than a year to live. Within a few months she was in a wheel chair; barely able to move. Waiting for death- just sitting in her chair she realized that she did not want to die before she experienced unconditional love.

Instead of making funeral arrangements: 

But she hated herself, her body and inside she felt mean and critical of those around her. Somehow she understood that  unconditional love was not possible with so much self hatred. She began a daily practice of looking at herself in the mirror-no clothes- on just sitting and staring at her sagging body that could no longer support her.

Writing It All Down

At first she wrote down every negative thought she had about herself, and her failing body. It was a shock to discover  that she had no loving thoughts left at all. She stared at herself day after day until that moment when she found one thing about herself that was acceptable.  With that she began to rewrite  her negative thoughts into positive statement about herself. As she reached a point of complete self acceptance with her imminent death a shift began to occur. As she learned to love herself …..her body began to heal…

From getting to giving:

She stopped expecting something in return for any of her actions. She began giving to those around here without trying to impress anyone. Each night before sleep she would evaluate her day and ask had she been of service to anyone? Had she been loving? Slowly this practice began to transform her body.

Forgiveness replaced resentment: 

She realized that the only person resentment over past actions was hurting was….herself.

Self-hatred became self-acceptance and then unconditional self love:

Her lifelong disapproval of her own appearance was a heavy burden. No matter what her body looked like now-she came to understand that the first person to love was herself.

Love had to begin inside her. She made the decision to learn to love herself and her body before she died. It was not easy but she began to say out loud. “I love you”  Over time her affection and self acceptance became very real.

For the first time in her life she began to know complete contentment and love for herself that grew and blossomed. Soon she was able to begin sincerely loving those around her with no expectations of anything coming back.  As those around her experienced her change they began to love her and she grew to easily accept their love for her.

From escape with death to accepting life exactly as it is:

She realized that she had felt quite dissatisfied with her job and wanted to quit anyway. She now could look at her entire past and understand that other choices had always been available to her.

Celebrating being alive every minute: 

As she continued with her mirror; she awakened to the idea of celebrating every moment that she was alive-instead of planning her death.

Sharing inner feelings and hurtful emotions is how to let go of them:

Anger, resentment, disappointment  such painful emotions were difficult to identify at first. As she began sharing openly what was really going on inside her  she realized these old hurt feelings were no longer serving her and they began to disappear. Instead of avoiding closeness and intimacy she opened herself to love. With this shift opening her heart to emotional, spiritual, intellectual and physical love brought her the true experience of unconditional love.

So what happened? 

As this woman-let go of her past hurts, inner pain and resentment she was able to accept her self  just the way she was.  She opened to love in every remaining moment of her life. Her body slowly restored itself and she was able to walk again, resume work and begin a new career. Evy McDonald has now been in remission for 34 years.

This is a true story of a courageous woman who recovered her own wholeness and healed herself by discovering her ability to love.  You can read more about Evy's story in the references below.

For those who are close to death opening to love may not change the time of their passing-but it can lead to a more peaceful acceptance of what is meant to be. Opening to love can bring ease, healing and positive change and of course opening to love always brings well-more love.

I enjoy hearing about your healing adventures and respond to all communications so let me hear from you by posting your comments or emailing me direct.

References: 

1.Evelyn R. McDonald, M.S., Sue A. Wiedenfeld, Ph.D., et. al., “Survival in Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis: The Role of Psychological Factors,” Archives of Neurology,  Vol. 51, January 1994.

2. Evy McDonald, R.N., M.S., M.Div., “Another Perspective of ALS,” Holistic Medicine, March/April 1988. http://www.ahha.org/articles.asp?Id=55.

 Join me at The Wholeness Project-Fulfilling the Hearts  Desire for Oneness

August 9, 2014 Oakland California

Renewal, Love, Service

Isn’t it astonishing to know that the human body regenerates itself completely every 5-7 years? Our brains are replaced every two months and our stomach makes new cells every 5 minutes.1 Truly we are a miracle of renewal and regeneration.

Today I am thinking about inner renewal. I believe that each of us comes  from a spark of the Divine- that creative life force from which all  existence is made. I believe that human consciousness is forever expanding. As my body is being made new each day my spirit is continually refreshed with the flow of creative Divine Intelligence.

Sometimes I can lose my focus and start to get bogged down. Do you ever have that experience?  For me when that occurs-- my life requires  real effort and feels like work.  What helps me as I realize this has happened- is to pause and put my attention first, on my breath. 

As I breathe deeply I refocus and ask myself: How can I find joy in this moment? Remembering that the Divine Life Force is flowing through me, in me and is actually… me gets me back on track. Joy begins to percolate through me once again. 

When my actions are an expression of love in service to others or the world…my journey is smooth.  No matter how long my day lasts my spirit stays fresh.  I am renewed constantly so that I move forward- vibrant and alive.

What is renewal like for you?  Let’s talk about this and see if we can enhance our inner renewal together.  

“All beings are flowers

blossoming

In a blossoming universe”

Soen Nakagawa Roshi

 

1.Your Amazing Regnerating Body,(http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg1902556) Gaia Vince: 19 June 2006: Magazine issue 2556;newscientist.com

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                                    Freedom and Forgiveness-Hawaiian Ho'o pono pono

Inner Vision, Glaucoma and Love

The Shambala teachings of Tibetan Buddhism consider vision to be a form of bravery.  To see clearly what is directly in front of us and keep moving forward so we engage in life-one must realize their own basic goodness and confidence which allows them to perceive  the basic goodness of the world. The illumination which occurs when this change takes place is called the Great Eastern Sun.

Whether it is the Great Eastern Sun of self illumination or simply the light of day in your own bedroom-that you see....inner vision and love can help your eyes see more clearly and allow you to feel whole and complete.

Your Thoughts Can Influence Your Healing

I believe that we live in a reciprocal universe-what we believe and think about shapes our reality. Inner work on ourselves is a wonderful tool for retraining your body and mind to assist you in healing.  

Not everyone is seing clearly-3 million Americans & 67 million people around the globe are vision impaired with glaucoma.  Glaucoma is a family of eye diseases that can influence the pressure in the eye in different ways which can damage the optic nerve producing vision loss or even blindness when these conditions go untreated.

Unfortunately the onset of glaucoma is not always easy to feel in the early stages. All adults should have their eyes checked regularly. Glaucoma is associated with dizziness, sinus problems, allergies, hypertension, diabetes or blood sugar problems so it is especially important to get an eye checkup if you have been concerned with these issues.

Western  medical therapies use eye drop medications and sometimes traditional  and/or laser surgery to keep the fluid pressure of the eye in balance and protect the optic  nerve. Glaucoma is a serious condition and these therapies are important to prevent loss of sight.

Here is a program that has helped many people enjoy better vision: 

New Thoughts for Healthy Eyes

Discover the best new thoughts for your inner and outer healing.
(From“You Can Heal Your Life”by Louise Hay, p.175.)

1.In a quiet time and place ask yourself: “Are there long standing or overwhelming hurts from the past? Any unforgiven events or hurts that could be affecting my eyes and glaucoma?”

If it doesn’t seem possible then ask yourself “What could be the thought patterns in me that are influencing my vision and how my eyes heal?”

2. Repeat to yourself, “I am willing to release the patterns in my consciousness that are influencing my vision or may have created this condition.”

3.Louise Hay found these affirmations helpful with vision & glaucoma but if they do not resonate with you- feel free to create one that does.

                                              “I see with love and tenderness”

                                              “I see with love and joy”

                                              “I now create life I love to look at”

Repeat your affirmation as a new thought pattern to yourself several times.

4. Allow yourself to assume that you are already healing. Use your  affirmation-at least three or four times each day and whenever you find yourself thinking about your vision.

Try Inner Vision and Love for 30 Days

Give yourself one month of using this method daily. These few minutes of focusing on yourself in a relaxed and loving manner will surely help you feel better. I would love to hear how it works for you.

Next week in part 2 I'll explain natural steps to normalize fluid pressure and slow down the progression of Glaucoma. These alternative steps also make it easier for your body to process glaucoma medications more effectively and reduce possible side effects.
 

"The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision"

Helen Keller

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